There are a couple of reasons for this e-mail even though I’m not away from home. First is the Trilanders meeting this next Saturday, April 16th, at the cottage at Crooked Lake. Any of you who don’t know the way, let me know and I’ll send directions. Bring what you want to drink (I have Crystal Light, beer made by son, Matt, with me watching, fixin’s for Margaritas, and some odd assortments of fine liquors and wine). I’ll cook some sort of dead animal, but a few could bring salads, vegetables, or other things jocks are supposed to eat.

Secondly, I think we need to have an intervention for Jon. Back when we started training for Triathlon, he said that all bikers shaved their legs, so he did and many of you went along. I didn’t because I’m a little on the hairy side (sorry for the gross-out) and don’t know where to quit.

Then when the group did their first Ironman race at The Great Floridian, Jon said Ironman athletes painted their toenails, so many of you did that too. The excuse was that the toenail polish helped the toes slide against the shoes and alleviated “black-toe”. For you non-runners, it’s not a pretty sight.

Now that many of us are training for the Bayshore Marathon, and he’s running with Laura helping out with her training, he says that he’s wearing women’s underwear because the seams are less irritating on those long runs. He says he gets them from Victoria Secret, but I think he’s wearing the “J. Edgar Hoover model” from those “special catalogs” they advertise on the internet.

I thought this training was for health and fitness, but this seems to be going a little too far. I’m not sure whether Jon’s suggestions are genuine, or he’s fulfilling a life-long fantasy. What do you think? At next week’s run (at Becky’s cabin in the woods-no, the run isn’t flat), maybe we should elect three unbiased chafing checkers who would inspect all runners for “rub marks”. Any volunteers?

Just (Unshaven, Unpainted, Tighty Whities) Jack